Don't waste the wine!

There I was, browsing the wine aisle for something different from the usual Moscato, Oliver, or Reggae Red. I walked back and forth again and again looking for something to strike my fancy when, there it was, a black bottle with one red blood drop looking thing on it and the words sweet red.

The bottle cost about $10, which is a little more than I like to pay. My favorite only cost $7 or $8. However, of course I bought it. I mean come on, it looked cool and seemed like it would taste delish. I put it in the fridge right when I got home. I didn’t even take my coat off because I was so excited to get it chilled and try it. A few hours later, Kerry (one of my besties) and I settled down with a cold glass of Red Drop wine. Now first let me tell you, I am by no means a wine connoisseur. I would like to be and I’m trying to learn more about wine and what I like by just trying new things. I picked up my glass, swirled it around, and gave it a good whiff. It had a barrel/wood smell. That is not a good sign for me. The smell reminded me of a merlot, and I would rather die of dehydration than to drink a merlot. I took a sip and….wow, it was disgusting. This beautiful “sweet” wine was as dry as can be. We ended up putting it back in the fridge and opening some Lotto Moscato. I told Kerry to take the Red Drop home with her. Although she didn’t like it, she was at least able to finish her glass. She advised me to keep it in the fridge and use it to cook with.

This was a good idea so; I kept it in the fridge for a couple weeks awaiting a good recipe to come along. I have never cooked with wine, besides the occasional marsala. They say to cook with wine that you would drink. Although I didn’t like it, it was still a good wine.

Today I decided to experiment a little with this “cooking with wine” thing. Not sure exactly what I was doing or how it would turn out I threw a few ingredients into the good ol’ crock-pot and let it cook for 8 hours. The house smelled great and at first taste, it was delish.

I looked online and I guess I made a sort of…trailer park beef burgundy. I will include the recipe. I used a whole cup of red wine. I’m sure the wine cooked off in the 8 hours because I planned to feed it to my boys. Is that bad? Anyway, they loved it and both of them had seconds. I couldn’t believe it. I made a creation that everyone ate. And just let me tell you. My boys are the fussiest eaters ever. If it isn’t mac and cheese, pizza, or chicken nuggets, they usually won’t touch it. So the fact that they even tasted this concoction was a big surprise. So, here’s what I did…

In a crock-pot, mix the following ingredients. 1 normal size can of cream of mushroom soup, 1 pk. Of onion soup mix, 1 cup of red wine, 1 chopped onion, ½ c. of mushrooms, 1 ½ pounds of round steak, and a little bit of pepper. Just throw everything in there, put the lid on it, and let it cook away. When it is done, shred the beef and serve it atop some egg noodles. YUM.

I was surprised that it wasn’t salty or…winey. A perfect end to the day. Now I want some popcorn. Or ice cream......or popcorn on ice cream. Lol, i'm craving something sweet and salty.

Now for a clip of something that happened today:

As we sat down to eat, my chair moved in a weird way and made a fart sound. My boys laughed so I continued to make the sound so that they would know that it was the chair and not Mom who “did it”. Of course, with a bunch of little boys, it wasn’t a smart move to keep making the sound. I couldn’t convince them that it was the chair. It WAS the chair people. I was being taunted, “Ohh, hahaha, Mommy farted. Mommy farted a lot. Hahaha!” Since they didn’t believe me, what else was I to do but claim it? I said, “HEY! Girls don’t fart. That sound you heard was actually baby unicorns being released into the world to sprinkle sugar on cookies!” I thought my comment would confuse them and ultimately, make them stop giggling. I ended up creating my own monsters because all I heard after that was how bad they wanted some sugar cookies. Ugh, a girl can’t win. Moral of the story…Just say excuse me and move on.

My balls are better than Babycakes! :)

Have you ever seen those Baby cakes baking machines? They are like easy bake ovens for adults and you can cook cupcakes, whoopee pies, doughnuts, and cake balls in them. Well, you would have to buy a different baby cake machine for each use but…you get the picture. Anyway, I am very bitter toward the cake ball machine. I have been making cake balls or as I call them “Cake Ball Bon-Bons” for years. The way I do it involves a lot of steps, its time consuming, and it is a lot of work. However, the ending product results in beautiful little cake treats that taste amazing. The Babycake machine took my cake ball and warped it into something different. All you do is pour cake batter into each of the rounded slots, close the lid and bake it. When it’s done, you are left with little balls of cake, they look like doughnut holes. Many people dip them in chocolate or put a design on them. I have seen them put on sticks as little cake lollipops also. Why am I so bitter toward this machine? Well, first of all, they don’t make balls that taste as good as mine and secondly, they make the process look to easy. (Plus, I feel like this was my idea and they stole it)

I have decided that the  thing that would make me most happy would be to give away my secret recipe for my version of Cake Balls. Maybe by doing this, people will forgo wasting money on the adult easy bake ovens and do it the old-fashioned way. Although they are more work, you and everyone else will be much more satisfied. Read on to be enlightened….or at least for my recipe. J

To make cake balls, you will need a box cake mix, one container of frosting and either almond bark, candy coating, or chocolate chips. You can use any flavor combination you would like. Here are a few I have used…

·         Chocolate cake, German chocolate frosting

·         Carrot cake, cream cheese frosting

·         Cherry cake, chocolate frosting

·         Caramel cake, chocolate frosting

·         Strawberry cake, chocolate frosting

There is a wide-open playing field of flavor combinations and colors. It all depends on what you want and what you want it to look like. So, have fun with your choice. Today I chose white cake mix with white frosting and white almond bark. I have a baby shower to go to and I’m bringing cake balls for dessert. The shower is for a baby girl so, I’m going to use food coloring to dye my cake pink.

What you do is mix up the cake as directed on the box and bake it just as it says. That’s pretty simple right? Now, right when the cake is done baking, rather than letting the cake cool and frosting it, take a fork, and scrape the cake into a big bowl. That’s right, it will be crumbly and it will ruin the cake but that is the point. In the bowl, you will have broken, crumbly, cake. It’s perfectly okay. Next, take the whole container of frosting and plop it right on top of the crumbled up bake. Take a fork and mix it all together. Break up the cake as much as you can and make sure it the cake and frosting are mixed up together really well. (Yes, it will look like someone chewed up a cake and spit it back into the bowl…but it is do delish and will look amazing when we are done) Put the mixture in the fridge to chill. I usually will chill it for between 3 to 24 hours. When you take it out of the fridge, it will look like this.

I told you it wouldn’t be pretty. Now, either melt your chocolate chips or melt your almond bark. I like to put my almond bark in a small saucepan with sort of tall sides, turn the heat to low, and let it go.

Although almond bark is usually easy to work with, it can get messed up really easily so, keep these tips in mind.

1.       Do not put a lid on it when melting it. Even a drop of water from condensation can ruin the entire batch.

2.       Use a double boiler if not microwaving (if you’re not skilled at working with it).

3.       Keep it at a uniform temperature. If it gets cool and warm and cool again, little lumps will form and you will have to remelt them before using it again and this can mess up the bark.

4.       If it’s too hot, it will scorch and be too think to use or it will lose moisture and…be too thick to use.

5.       Do not put water, cream, milk, oil, or butter in it to “remelt” it. It won’t work and the mixture will seize up. The package say’s you can use shortening but, I have tried that and it didn’t work either.

While it melts, start rolling your cake into balls. I use a melon baller to make each ball uniform. I think it holds about 2tsp. and I can usually get about 75 to 100 cake balls out of one batch. Once all of your balls are rolled, make sure your chocolate is melted, and lay down a piece of wax paper or parchment paper on the counter. I like to use a fork and a knife when coating the balls with the melted bark. Put one ball into the melted bark. Make sure it is fully covered. Pick it up out of the bark with the fork and gently tap the fork on the side of the pan to get any excess off and to smooth the bark on the ball. Then, move the fork over to the wax paper and gently slide the ball off of the fork with the knife. Keep doing this until all of your balls are covered. If you plan to put sprinkles on your balls, do it while the bark is still wet because it will harden. Decorate them however you want. Play with it and have fun!

Once they harden, you can pick them up and break off any excess hardened bark to make it look nice. I like to place each ball in a mini muffin paper cup. It makes them look pretty and it hides any imperfections. Also, it’s easier to package them and transport them this way. I forgot to get the paper cups so, I’ll just break off the hard bits and put them on a platter. J

…..and if you think those are good, you’ll love the cookie bon-bons!