Weight is great....right?

Let us start today with a quote from the late great Andy Rooney.

“The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.”

I thought this was appropriate considering how I feel this morning. I was thinking about what my Thanksgiving menu is going to be and what I am going to do. I want to keep the day very traditional. I was thinking about inviting the neighborhood over for a great feast, then kill them and steal their land…Okay, maybe not THAT traditional. My mouth watered when I thought of the food. A nice juicy turkey and lots and lots and LOTS of sides. Yes, I feel that it is perfectly acceptable to eat until you have to lean back and unbutton your pants. What’s a few pounds at during the holidays? Its expected and inevitable.

I do want to keep the weight gain to a minimal though, if I gain any at all. I’m not back to my pre pregnancy weight yet so, gaining isn’t exactly on my to do list. I was thinking about my weight today and had a few thoughts. For instance, have you ever grabbed your own butt just to try and feel what your husband would if he grabbed it? Yeah, me neither. Sheesh, do I look like a weirdo or something? Well, maybe I do, you can’t see me.

I learned what “fat” was at a really young age. Not that I had a complex about it or anything. I was just aware of it. I have to say, it was all downhill after I realized “elemonopee” was not just one awesome letter. It was the age that I started to compare my looks to everyone else’s. I didn’t care about what other people thought about me, but more about how I felt about myself. Now that I am older, a mom, and with someone who loves me, I am finally happy in my own skin. I’m told by the three most important men in my life that I am beautiful and pretty all the time. I do believe them; however, you’ll never catch me in a mini skirt or fishnet stockings. Why you ask? Well, have you ever pushed cookie dough through a sifter before? Maybe I’m exaggerating a little…or a lot. But still. I’m happy being ol’ modest me.

I plan to eat like a cow from now until New Year’s. My resolution is going to be to lose weight, or at least get back to the weight I was before having babies. It should be a piece of cake…a piece of delicious chocolate cake…I want cake. J

I didn’t intend to make a big deal out of this weight and body image thing. I was just thinking about it. I guess it’s all about perspective and how you look at it. I mean, the sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the kitchen. I’m staying positive on the whole issue. Like I said though. Everything is free game now. I want cake, pie, and cookies. This reminds me…at the grocery store today I bought cookie dough so that dad can bake cookies with the boys. The label of the chocolate chip cookie dough warned: “Do not consume raw cookie dough” and I realized that that has to be the most ignored warning label ever. I, on the other hand, chose some sugar cookie dough that was precut and had images on it. It was pretty cool, I’m sure the boys will love it. Since Ryder puts EVERYTHING in his mouth, I may have to hire security guards to make sure he follows that raw dough warning.

I can’t wait to have a fresh warm cookie! YUM! A cookie and a nice hot cut of coffee sounds like a gift from God…A Starbucks man would be a nice gift too. I think that the ice cream man should automatically change his “goods” in the cooler months and start slinging coffee. Can you see it? Your baking cookies and suddenly, you hear coffee house music, “OH MY GOSH! It’s the Starbucks man! Do we have cash? HURRY HURRRRY!”

Anyway, this post is getting a little out of hand. Is every post supposed to stay on topic? Because I totally got off track…again. I have schoolwork to do still and I have to find something to eat as, my stomach is growling like crazy talking about all this delicious food and drink. I’m trying to think of what sounds good because I have NONE of the things that I mentioned. I guess I’ll have a bowl of the generic frosted flakes that I have in the cabinet. They’rrrrrrrr, alright I guess.

Till next time………

Thoughts on Potty Training

This may seem like it’s coming from out of the blue. I mean, I only have a few friends whose kids are potty training but I felt urged to share some things that worked and most importantly, didn’t work for me (or my boys). The only reason I am on this topic is because my oldest, Stefan, is recently 100% potty trained. He is 4 years old and still wore a diaper during the night because that was what he was comfortable with. Well, I’m pleased to say that for the last 8ish days, he has worn big boy undies to bed and woke up each night, completely dry. Bone dry! Now I have my youngest, Ryder, who is really not serious about getting out of diapers at all. Yes, he will go #1 and very rarely #2 on the potty, but its only when he wants to. He controls the outflow and when it happens and nobody can tell him otherwise. To get on with it, this is what I have learned so far.

*Some of the things that did or did not work for me, may or may not work for you. I’m not judging or criticizing, just stating what I tried.

1.  Do not demand that they start using the potty on YOUR schedule. This does not work. They will only start to “train” when THEY are ready.

2.  Don’t let them run around in their underwear or naked all day. This may work at home, but it does absolutely nothing when you are away from home. In addition, if they do have an accident, there is nothing to stop the “excrement” from seeping right into your carpet or worse, your couch. And trust me; it is not easy to clean this smell out. I had to buy a whole new couch. At least cloths, even undies, would have caught a little bit.

3.  Someone once told me that if they have an accident in their underwear, leave them in it so they learn a lesson. DO NOT DO THIS. I could give a few reasons why but, it just seems like child abuse to me. It is wrong! And no, I did not try this one.

4.  Do not make them sit on the potty until they “go”. This will seem like a punishment and face it; the potty is scary at first. I did this one time and my boys did now want to sit on the potty again at all. They thought I was going to make them sit there all day. (Although the only time I tried this it was only for 10 minutes before a glorious poo made an appearance) I wish I hadn’t because it took me forever to get my now potty-trained champ to try again.

5.  Do not move a small potty to the hallway, bedroom, living room, or anywhere else besides the bathroom. We are not training an animal here. The only acceptable place to go to the bathroom is…in the bathroom. Unless you are on a long road trip or someplace where no bathroom is near, in this case, a tree is perfectly acceptable for boys. If you have a little girl, I don’t know what to tell you. J

6.  Incentives do not work. Okay, maybe they do work a little but they are more of a hassle than a help. If you start giving them candy for using the potty, they will expect it every time they go. Even if it is a little dribble, even if they are potty trained, even if they just sit there and do nothing “I swear mommy, I peed a little, can I have some candy?”

7.  Do not put them down. Saying things like, “you’re such a baby. You’re not a big boy because you’re still in diapers. I hate changing your diaper. Your nasty.” Is just going to hurt their feelings and give them a complex. Is negative reinforcement ever acceptable?

Now, let me tell you what works, or what worked for me. Let them go on their own time. Ask them if they have to go or if they want to go. Do not demand that they go. Praise even the smallest of trickles. Yes, I jumped up and down, hooted and hollered, danced around and gave them a high five. Say things that are encouraging, “Woohoo, look at you! What a big boy! I’m so happy, I’m so proud of you. Lets tell daddy/Grampa/anyone and everyone. You’re so awesome.” Next, bribe them. Okay, wait a minute. Lets use the word “incentive” instead of bribe. Yes, I said that incentives do not work but bear with me. I use this “incentive” in a different way. If he stayed dry all through the night, I told him that we would ride bikes the next day. If he stayed dry for two nights, we would have a movie night. These are the kind of bribes, excuse me, “incentives” that you always want. Its just family time but it seems like more because the secret is to make a big deal out of it. I said to my oldest, “If you stay dry all night (again), we are going to watch Cars2 and have a pajama and movie night with popcorn.” He was so excited. I even went as far as to get an adult size onsie pajama with footies so we could all wear matching pajamas. Even though it was just a movie night, it was a special time. Anyway, to make a long story…well…long, try what you want, just keep my tips in mind. They won’t be in diapers forever.

On a side note. My oldest kept asking for something to drink last night at bedtime. I know he was stalling. I kept saying no to the drink because he has been accident free and I knew that water would surely do him in. I didn’t want to take the chance of waking up to….a big mess. It reminded me of this joke………..

………”A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later.....'Da-ad....''What?'' I'm thirsty. Can you bring a drink of water?'' No, You had your chance. Lights out.' Five minutes later: 'Da-aaaad.....''WHAT? ''I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??'' I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to smack you!!' Five minutes later......'Daaaa-aaaad.....''WHAT!'' When you come in to smack me, can you bring a drink of water?”